Preview: When it comes to selecting a spouse we ought to choose wisely.

Sunday morning Shawn and I attended the 8 AM worship service at Providence Baptist Church. Pastor David Horner spoke from I Timothy 6:11-16 and challenged us to be loyal, faithful and true to Jesus Christ. In the early part of his message, Pastor Horner triggered a few snickers with this question, “What was it about your spouse that made you fall in love?”

Some are hesitant to admit falling in love happened a long time ago. Perhaps we’ve been together so long we can’t remember life before the wedding. Others fear making such a list may lead to a marital skirmish, especially if we can’t fill the paper with words. Honesty can dunk us in hot water, also. Confess our eyes were captured and our hearts were snared by the simple harmonic motion we observed in those dangerous curves and we go directly to the doghouse. Do not pass “Go” and do not collect $200.

One of my writing projects is a DIY guide for young men entitled “How to find a wife”. I am having fun with it and promise the usual level of snarkiness. Choosing a spouse is such an important decision. As I write the guide, I am reliving experiences leading to the big moment in 1980 when I asked Shawn to be my bride. My pathway forward was uncharted but looking back, I can see there were guideposts pointing the way.

Sunday morning I gave myself an action item to consider David Horner’s question and capture something in writing. As I let Shawn know how certain I was she was the right choice for me, perhaps another man will follow my example and find courage to share with his wife. Investing in our relationships is a necessity. Doesn’t it feel good when our closest friend lets us know why we are special?

For the record, and this is on the Internet so it has to be true, what was it about Shawn Rae Eddy that made me fall in love with her? How did I know she was The One?

  • Being around Shawn gave me a feeling of joy I had not experienced. We seemed to click from the start.
  • I was at ease with her. I found I could talk with her about anything.
  • She didn’t talk all the time. We took turns.
  • She focused on me when I spoke. She made me feel as though I had something worth saying, something she wanted to hear.
  • We were OK with silence. Words were not always needed.
  • Shawn did not look at me or through me or past me. She looked on me.
  • Those blue eyes were so deep a man could swim in them. I fell in and never came back.
  • Her smile lit up the room. Those dimples radiated hope. Her laughter sent sadness scurrying away.
  • Shawn didn’t sneer at my faith although she didn’t share it. She let me explain why God mattered and embarked on her own search for His truth. The night she trusted Christ as her Savior was the happiest moment for me.
  • That girl was (is) passionate and that is all I’m going to say about that one.
  • When we were apart all I could think about was how soon we could meet again. Our courtship was long distance and dating usually required interstate driving. We were too poor to talk on the phone much but we wrote a lot of letters.
  • Shawn wrote love poems for me. I never understood all of them but I have them tucked away.
  • Her voice brought comfort and she sang like an angel.
  • I watched Shawn’s concern for the needs of others. She was a giver.
  • As we grew closer I wanted to defend and protect her. I wanted to give her things and provide for her needs. She became my greatest treasure.
  • Shawn told me one day, “I feel so comfortable with you. Like we are supposed to be together.” I understood exactly what she meant. I was ready to move to the next step and asked her, “Will you marry me?”
  • She said, “Yes”

OK, men, time to answer the question. What was it about your spouse that made you fall in love? Stretch out and warm up before you start writing. We don’t want any pulled muscles. Email me if you need help. This is important. Your lady is waiting for your answer.